Today's Pearl Of Wisdom:

"Nobody can take away your problems, but there are some people who make really good mirrors."

In my work as a mental health clinician, and in my experience as a human being who often finds himself among the needy in my personal life as well, I have had been thanked for being the "thing" that got people past their misfortune, adversity, crisis, obstacle, rough time, call it what you will. I contend that what I offer in being present for someone is not a bunch of words that may work well for me, rather, a good ear and a pathway of dialogue that somehow elicits a reflection of the person's behaviors, reactions, attitudes, etc. Trying to offer advice to someone who cannot see the thesis of their problem is like clipping weeds in a garden and expecting them to be gone. I'll be the first to say that the therapist whose session is just about offering advice to his/her client is merely a weed clipper. The client must do the speculating, the analyzing, the questioning, the risk taking and be the one asking the questions AND answering them. A therapist's function is to guide you along that tenuous trip toward yourself, support you in places that are frightening and assist you when you are stepping off course. But an effective therapist NEVER says, "you should". Only you know what you should do and a good mirror will show you exactly who you are, for good or for bad....and thats a good thing.

Thanks for reading,
Patrick