"Seeing the good in everyone is not a pre-requisite to knowing it exists."

I remember it well. It was 8:59 PM on Thursday night, October 18, 1990 and, just like every other Thursday night, I was waiting patiently in front of the TV for the opening credits to Knots Landing. But this would not be like any other Thursday night. What would happen for me in the proceeding hour would impact my life enough to not only remember it, but to still be writing about it 20 years later in this blog for you.

The episode was called, "Dead, But Not Buried" and it was known as Michelle Lee's greatest TV performance, (nominating her for an Emmy). In an emotional retort to someone calling her a "Pollyanna" for her view of the world, "Karen" lashes back with a 3 minute, gutt-wrenching defense of her belief in all people as innately good. She is like a mother bear protecting her metaphorical cub, which was her belief system, her peace, her joyful place, the place where she drew her happiness. There I was, mouth wide open, tears in my 21 year old eyes, with a desire to stand up and cheer as vivid in my mind as if I had seen it this morning. You see, I had been called Pollyanna myself many times before that night, and even more times since. I always liked my belief that people really didn't intend to hurt other people, that under layers of life experiences existed in everyone a loving, kind human being just waiting to be accessed by someone who believed it was in there somewhere. Uncovering it in people was always a rush for me. Did I find it in everyone? No. Do I still believe it exists? Hell yeah. Someone has to, right? Otherwise, they are people sailing through this world navigating aimlessly from their sad, broken places. We all need someone to take the wheel for a while until we are able to find our own way.

That night, Karen was my own voice, and she articulated what I felt so perfectly that I felt a validation which was freeing for me. I have never again questioned being a "Pollyanna", "naive", a "granola", or a "do-gooder", just to name a few names I have been given over the years. Instead, I celebrate it. I love trying to understand everyone as kind, despite their less-than kind presentation, because if my belief is that they are lost rather than ill-intended, I cannot truly justify my anger toward them; a gift to both of us.

We should all be so protective of our happiness as Karen was that cool October night. We may not have to always do so in this way, however. Maybe it’s just about turning off the news once you get the weather or giving someone the benefit of the doubt. People are watching you. And if they see something working for you enough times, they may be inclined to try it themselves, and this, my kind friend, is how we change the world…..one Pollyanna at a time.